(…headlined with sincerest apologies to the memory of George Orwell). The other week, for the first time in a long one, I went to Colbert, a brasserie close to Sloane Square tube station in London SW1. It styles itself as being “inspired by the great boulevard cafes of Paris”. Overall, I think it does a pretty good job of living up to its ambitions, both inside and out.

As is frequently the case in Paris, the tables at Colbert spill out on to the pavement, the better to cater for its customers

The fare on offer would certainly not be out of place in Montparnasse or Montmartre. For a generous snack, it could be the croque monsieur or a croque madame. Or soupe a l’Oignon. I did opt for soup to start, although in my case it was a chilled tomato version served with basil creme fraiche. On a hot day, like so many have been this past summer, it was a perfect and refreshing way to begin a meal. (As you can see from the photo below, I didn’t demand to much of the kitchen’s cooking facilities when it came to my entrée either.)

The large version of the steak tartare for me, served with frites of course…I think one could not have a more quintessentially French meal

Sea bream, sea bass and sea trout were among the fish dishes on the menu but, as I have already made clear, it was meat for me. There were a couple of other steak dishes I could have chosen, both involving the food having been fried or grilled, but the only other option I seriously considered was the pan-roasted Toulouse sausage, which was accompanied by braised lentils and lyonnaise onions. But I didn’t consider that for long because the previous week I had had essentially that very dish while in France. In fact, while in Toulouse. At a pavement brasserie. Parfait!

Parisian brasseries do not come any more renowned than this one: Les Deux Magots in the Saint-Germain des Pres area of the city

A final point. A couple of days after I went to Colbert, I thought I would see what visitors to Tripadvisor had to say about it. It was a total waste of time. To be fair, I could have guessed this the moment I read the site’s…er, advisory that the summary in question had been ‘created by AI, based on recent reviews’. By way of a three-sentence example: “The authentic French bistro-style food garners acclaim for its refined flavors (sic!), though some guests express concerns about value and occasional inconsistency. While many find the staff attentive and professional, others note slow service and mechanical interactions. Despite its allure, the restaurant’s high prices and surcharges are mentioned by several reviewers, though some find the value reasonable given the ambiance (sic!) and location.”

In other words, some people really liked it, others did not. And using AI effectively rendered the review redundant. Bon appetit!

Robert Green